The author is unknown on these hilarious shorts, but they're making the rounds as "forwarded" email and I thought it appropriate to share here...
I was in the six-items-or-less express lane at the store quietly fuming. Completely ignoring the sign, the woman ahead of me had slipped into the checkout line pushing a cart piled high with groceries. Imagine my delight when the cashier beckoned the woman to come forward, looked into the cart and asked sweetly, "So, which six items would you like to buy?"
Because they had no reservations at a busy restaurant, my elderly neighbor and his wife were told there would be a 45-minute wait for a table. "Young man, we're both 90 years old, " the husband said. "We may not have 45 minutes." They were seated immediately.
Life's short. Never be too open-minded--your brains may fall out!!